Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

1. The First Amendment to the U.S. Constitution

It is amazing to me that here on this burning ball of confusion that we call earth in the times we live in with transmen having babies and transwomen in starring roles on prime-time TV shows, that we in the Transworld are still so sensitive to WORDS. And we are also extremely judgmental with in our own community. I recently got the shaft, big time, for stating an opinion of something that I do see and has recently caused me some alarm.

NOTE: The opinions posted here are of and by me, Jennifer M. Barge, and in no way reflect goal-oriented agendas, other than to express a view. If you feel this is wrong or that this expression of opinion may offend you, then please turn the page. Now that being said let me further say this. It is only my view, does not include all or none or any group other than to those it applies to.

A few weeks ago, I was on a popular trans-chat site where I had expressed that I saw a new trend starting to emerge that caused a little concern in me.

As some of you know my lover and I have a home stay guesthouse in Black Mountain and we have guests in and out all year long. Well as it so happens, we do a lot of different types of services from gender transformations to counseling to spirit work. We recently had a person (let’s call this person Pat) come stay with us who wanted some advice on the option of expressing a more masculine side. Pat was a lesbian, and even a self-proclaimed “ Butch” lesbian [oh goddess, not the B word]. Yes that very word that caused the Trans masculine world to hate on me in a way that I found, well, silly.

So back to the events that led me to become the most hated transwoman online for 2 days.

So as our visitor started to meet some of Asheville’s finest offerings in the transman world, Pat became seduced by the thought of becoming a man. By the time Sunday afternoon came around, Pat told me that s/he was going to transition, start to take “T,” write a book on the complete transition, document it via a reality TV show on a network, and become an activist “...because  you transwomen do not know how to do it the right way!”.

I was stunned at that last departing line out of Pat’s mouth. But also it caused a shift in certain things I had been seeing right here in good ‘ol A-she-ville since I moved here. I have seen transmen do great things and with great intent. But also I have witnessed many transmen express other agendas at work in their goals. I know that some transmen have transitioned only to be able to obtain “Male-privalige”. That some of our transmen believe that the transwomen are foolish for wanting to renounce that edge of masculinity and become, in their minds, second-rate citizens. And here was a person who was on the fence between lesbian and transman-hood telling me that since I was 14, I was not doing “it” right and that I needed a man to help get me there. This was amazingly amusing to me as I am a girl who remembers men running around foolishly to open doors and to buy me drinks and even pay my bills back when I was stealth. And that was only to get conversation from me.

So I, as a transwoman, am not doing “it “right? Well, needless to say, “Buddy blew my high” with that remark. I would like to say this: I believe we all as a community have good and bad in us. I believe a lot of work has been done both by transmen and transwomen and that we have a lot more work to do. I also believe it is work we need to continue to do together as a community and NOT as separate players. Not as “HIM” against “HER”. We have a lot against US in the world. But also, just like in the cisgendered world where people can more easily accept two women being together (as that is a fantasy) as opposed to two men being together, it reflects in gender.  As in, “of course I can see why a girl would want to be a boy or woman a man,” the Perversion is in a man lowering himself to be a “SHE.”  So to me it seems that it is easier for society to accept a transman because the “MALE” perceives himself to be dominate and unfortunately we girls allow this to happen…just like mom and dad taught us

I went on my chat line and expressed this very point. Well I was pretty much called stupid and a transman hater and told that I was out of touch with all the great works that the transmen have done for the greater good of all the transcommunity. I was asked not to post any more opinions and was even contacted by the leader of the group who is a transman himself and told I need not return as I upset the balance of his site. I was amazed only because in expressing that a butch lesbian teetering on the fence toward transman hood was only wanting to transition because s/he was wanting to play the ego card and show “us” how to do it right. And in pointing this out I offended many transmen. I was certain there were more secure people who knew if it did not apply, not to worry about it. I also felt that if these people did not really think they were the ones who could teach us fragile women how to really manage a cause, then why were they so offended.

It also made me see that we as people are always feeling we have to tip-toe around words and issues. We do not want to offend or upset. We do not want to spark inner action that might lead to new ways of perceiving our self or our world. No, we would rather play it safe and remain in the delicate world of politeness. So if I say black instead of African American, am I racist? If I say he instead of she, was the intent to be mean? Is “Butch” so sensitive a word that a transman feels less than masculine? Am I offending a whole movement with my simple words?  Do we stop expressing our opinions and views so that we can fit in? Are we as humans willing to allow our selves to become so afraid of the wrong word that we just stop expressing our self?

If I have pissed anyone off then good, because maybe we need to get pissed off instead of pissed on. And no, I am not some angry tranny thinking I know it all. I am a person who will call people or groups out on things that concern me. We are in a great time right now, with a lot of change on the way. We all need to call people out on agendas and find out what the real motive is.  And if we upset a few people, then maybe it is because what we are saying applies to them.  It is so funny to me how “we” all want to have the same rights and freedoms that regular main stream Americans take for granted, yet when one of our own expresses something that “we do not agree with, “we” all play the victim role to the point of possibly receiving an Academy Award for dragging a cross on our back.

Freedom of Speech is a very old right that was given to Americans back before hormones and top surgery and back when trans was not even thought of for even a car. This right was a part of the Bill of Rights, which was signed into law on December 15, 1791. It’s a great belief to think you have the right to say what you want, but you better not use it!
 
NOTES OF INTEREST IN THE TRANS- WORLD:
The Phoenix Transgender Group meets on the 13th of Sept. We are collecting any none- perishable food items at the meeting for The Loving Food
Resources and will donate to them in our name.

Also any good conditioned clothing you might not want will also be collected for the “ Project Re-entry Program” for prisoners soon to be released from
prison. Please contact Jennifer M. Barge at jelly381@yahoo.com.

The 2008 Asheville Aids walk is coming up on Oct 4th and any transperson wanting to be a positive part of this walk, please contact Jennifer M. Barge
at jelly381@yahoo.com.