For this month's installment of Bi-Lines, columnists Leo Benitez and Jen Watson decided to have a dialogue that began as a tongue-in-cheek jab at stereotypes of bisexual women and bisexual men, but turned into a rather thought-provoking look at why these stereotypes exist in the first place.

Bi Girl: Hello, token male bisexual columnist for OIA!

Bi Boy: Howdy, token female bisexual columnist for OIA. Or is it bicurious?

Bi Girl: Well you know, since all bi girls are really bicurious... just like you bi guys are really gay guys who can't fully come out.

Bi Boy: Well you know, it's hard what with all the societal pressures. Not that it's not just as challenging to identify with something as unknown and invisible that causes people to often just believe you must not exist.

Bi Girl: I know, sometimes I feel like a unicorn. So do your boyfriends mind that you have to bring women to bed every night in order to remain sexually fulfilled?

Bi Boy: No, but my girlfriends get pissed that I'm really just a sexual predator using them as a shield for my 'on the down low' ways. It’s also kind of awkward to have been unofficially blamed for bringing the AIDS epidemic to the normal straight world, with our decadent indecisive ways. How do you feel about being a commonly exploited heterosexual male fantasy in mainstream entertainment tripe? Does Tila Tequila make you go, "Gosh, it feels good to have role models?" 

Bi Girl: Well, since I only fool around with girls to turn guys on, it's just fine with me.  You've heard the Katy Perry song... women aren't threatening to men.  That's why bi girls are really straight girls in disguise, and bi guys are really gay guys in disguise... everyone just wants dick at the end of the day.  If you have the option to be with men, why would you ever be with women?  They lack such an important appendage.

Bi Boy: Well it’s like saying that because you love sushi you want to eat it everyday.

You know, some people just find it hard to believe that there exists fluidity and degrees in this world. Even if the existence of the bi label itself isn't questioned, people then tend to focus on the definition of the word. As in, “how can you like two opposites equally?”
Never mind that bisexuals can oscillate or are into gender-queer persons. Then there’s “what does it really mean to be bisexual; is one gay and straight, or something else entirely?”

As fluid and slippery as the subject is, this token doesn't profess to speak for everyone fitted into this narrow box, but he would like to pose this question: what's so wrong or hard to understand about, as Jeri Blank would put it, liking the pole and the hole?

Bi Girl: Because people focus so much on differences and not similarities.  As if both gender and sex are, in fact, binaries in which there exist "opposites," not just variations.
I have seen more differences between men and between women than I have seen between men and women. 

Plus, too many people like to justify "gay rights" based on the old "we can't help it" argument... which bisexuality supposedly weakens for some reason.  It really shouldn't matter if one can "help it" or not, or whether sexuality is at all based on choice... I don't feel like I ever made a choice, but if I had, I would expect the same rights as the next queer.

Bi Boy: As an addendum: I think it's interesting that most negative assumptions about bisexuality are driven by a self-centered version of the heterosexual male perspective: if she says she's bi, she must be straight and just curious, because then she could still desire me. And on the other side, if he says he's bi, he must just be gay because he must feel desire towards me, he's just too afraid to admit it.

It seems like playing apologist to ask for equality by saying "we can't help it," rather than "we deserve equal treatment because we're human beings." I think people are quick to jump at the notion that there is sexual fluidity and that, to a degree, we may not fully understand the dynamics of desire and degrees to which eroticism and fantasy play a part in one’s sexual appetites. It seems to not make sense to people that these desires can exist outside of an 'aberration' or a sort of birth defect.

"We were born this way, so treat us nicely," in my opinion, this is like saying "If we could help it, we would."

Bisexuality seems to confront that by posing the question, "if both possibilities are open, why choose the relationship you're in now? If you like men and women, why not just stick to women and lead a happy life?" Well, it's not quite that simple folks. To me, bisexuality answers those questions with, "We are what we are, whether there is choice or not." Equality lies in our shared humanity, not in the logic of ones desires.

Bi Girl: Bisexuality is confrontational; I like that.  It does seem to confront both "conservative" and "liberal," and "gay" and "straight" perspectives.  No one knows what to do with us.  Or maybe... they don't know what to do with themselves. (*cue cheesy sitcom music when a lesson has just been learned*)

Basically, I don't understand a single logical reason for biphobia unless it stems from fear.  'Nuff said.

Bi Boy: Fear and lack of visibility. I've been told that bisexuality must be like a super power, and who knows, even that may have something to do with the reticence we detect from mainstream gay and straight communities? Maybe because it seems (superficially) too good to be true, people think it must not exist. But I still remain confident that visibility is probably one of the best tools to rid social consciousness of stereotypes; the more kinds of individuals we are exposed to, the harder it is to generalize. And you know, some say there's a little bisexual in everyone, so perhaps once visibility itself helps people understand that it's ok, it may eventually not be stigmatized or marginalized.

Bi Girl: I think some of the fear also stems from the more conservative gay rights movement's defense against the "slippery slope" argument.  The argument that, if same-sex marriage is legalized, where do we draw the line?  What about group marriage?  They're so concerned about marriage rights that they can't risk losing the argument against homosexuality being a fixed trait with no variations. 

As far as visibility goes, that's why I identify as bisexual in the first place.  I hate binaries as much as the next person, but if people become more exposed to bisexuality as an identity they may be more likely to question the fixed nature of any sexual identity.  I am aware that I fit some stereotypes of bisexuals, but I go completely against others.  My goal is to embrace those stereotypes that are an intricate part of who I am, and respect those who fit the stereotypes I do not understand.  I would appreciate the same in return from the rest of the queer community.

Bi Boy: It's a little bit like calling yourself a Democrat, you know? Well, I shouldn't pretend to speak for other Dems, but really, in my case it's only apt because it's not Republican. Same as being bi, I sometimes feel it's only apt because it's not straight or gay.

Omnisexual makes me feel like an electrical appliance, pansexual makes me think of having sex with goats (it's just because of the pan prefix people, so steady your hatemail pens), and I couldn't really fit into polyamory, so what is left? Well, there's a whole spectrum of as-of-yet unnamed ways of desiring and finding fulfillment. 

In this day and age, when we are being confronted with so many repudiations to monumental assumptions (we can exploit the environment without deadly repercussions; America is unchallenged as a world power; our economy will always be prosperous), I have hope that perhaps rigid interpretations and expressions of sexuality will follow suit and be questioned. I am particularly excited about the increased visibility of the trans community, and I have no doubt that bisexuality could also easily achieve that prominence in GLBT discourse. After all, this “all bi all the time” column did not exist even 6 months ago.